


Manipulate Me

by tsukichim



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Demon Dean Winchester, F/M, Human Castiel, M/M, References to Supernatural (TV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-10-22 08:50:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10693584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsukichim/pseuds/tsukichim
Summary: With Human Castiel and Demon Dean. Castiel lives under his fathers footsteps until one night, when everything changes. His brother Gabriel is killed in a coldblooded accident that shockwaves his mentality. His whole life and name collapse into nothing. Dean later comes into the picture as his best friend. He influences him in ways best not described and becomes the Bonnie to his Clyde.





	1. Chapter One

"All saints have a past, and all sinners have a future." - Oscar Wilde

I splashed the water on my face, letting the coolness of the liquid calm my senses. The vibrations of the music and vibrant conversations seeped through the walls. I had no reason to be anxious, yet here I was in the bathroom, freaking out about something that hasn't even happened yet. I used my finger to wipe a lone droplet of sweat from my softly arched brow and focused on the chill of my hands. It was an exercise my therapists, Raphael, taught me. Recently, we've grown closer and he was the only person other than my brother, Gabriel, whom I consulted with. When I was with him I could breath and be myself, in a world where I had no power and no say-so.

"Castiel," He would say, "You are strong and have more power than you know, more potential than you can imagine."

I'd always reply briefly, though hesitantly, "In my world, I'm nothing but an insect." The scoff I received always made me turn away in disappointment. It reminded me of my father when I turned down his offer.

Of course what I said was true, but somewhere in my heart I wanted to believe him. Somewhere deep down, I wanted to show him I was that person he wanted me to be, even if it was someone unrecognisable.

I let out a long, periodical sigh and searched my features in the mirror. Another exercise. Blue eyes. Black hair. Straight nose. Anxiety so bad, if someone else was to get inside my head they'd kill themselves. This isn't working. I let out another breath, and decided it was better to just fake it. I could do this. It was a test, nothing major. Sure, my four older brothers would be watching to see whether he was worthy to partner in the sharing of our fortune, but that's just a normal Tuesday afternoon.

After debriefing every worst case scenario I finally put myself together. I was my notorious father, Chuck. I am supposed to smile, and strike down men with a single stare.

Without a second thought I stormed out of the bathroom, determined. Of course being the impulsive person that I am, I didn't expect to be met with such an extensive variety of stares. Immediately I regret leaving that bathroom. It felt as if they're eyes were little individual torture machines, meant to bore into your soul. Everything I convinced myself of in the bathroom, vanished. I was vulnerable to them.

"Brother."

My head snapped to my eldest brother. His sharp eyes warned me not to do anything stupid. Though they didn't just carry warnings, they offered threats. I knew punishment all too well. My mistakes led to deep scars that no one would speak of nor point out. I was simply a trophy meant to stay silent and content with my owner.

I silently nodded in his direction before turning to look for my partner, still uncomfortable with the thought of so many people watching me. My heart started pounding against my chest. The throbbing in my head caused my mind to race. If what I thought was happening, was taking place, I knew my punishment would be severe.

"There you are."

I heard a deep, velvet voice come from behind me. Relief doesn't even describe the feeling of comfort I found just from the warmth emitted by the vapour of his breath. My emptive instinct was to melt into him and fall into his shadow. Instead, I simply turned and faced him with a feigned face of confidence.

"Here I am." I replied briefly. There really was nothing more to say. Here I was, with a stranger, soon to be pledged as more if this went the way my brothers so tediously arranged. Of course even the house pet would rebel if it was confined and struck in the wrong fashion. This man was proof, his hard green eyes revealed that to me. They reeked of precariousness and I wanted to live vicariously through them. The pulsing of my heart flooded my ears at the hint of danger he voided, just by returning the equal eagerness to know my character. I could tell he saw right through me. I was naked in his eyes. My full, true image was revealed to him the moment I became vulnerable to his gaze. To say he intimidated me was an understatement.

Without thinking, my eyes flickered over his large silhouette. His build was more natural than the majority of the gentlemen here. They usually had to work for their bodies, while he inherited his. The bulge of his muscle was prominent beneath his smooth threads. Even the crinkles of his fabrics worked as aesthetics. He was mesmerising, not in a way of attraction, but curiosity.

"I don't like much being stared at," he spoke, knocking me out of my mind. His eyes however, dared me to take another prolonged glance. "It proves to be disrespectful in most cases."

I widened my eyes before turning away.

"My apologies. Your openness has taken me aback." I answered truthfully.

"I haven't spoken much." He countered. I felt his chest against my back.

"You're mistaken," I explained. "I was referring to your eyes."

His presence seemed to present itself closer. The feeling of his breath fanned over my ears as he whispered, "And what do they say?"

I trembled before muttering back, "They say...you're dangerous."

His voice unlike my stature was sure and steady. "You believe them."

I crooked my neck to gaze into his eyes. "I fear if I don't, I'll spend an eternity wondering who you are."

"Why not simply ask?" He probed. His olive eyes never faltered and his breath was steady.

"The truth will never prevail when a man like you has secrets. You're bonded to lies and deceit."

"With me, you'll never have to worry about that. I would never lie to you."

I closed my eyes. Hearing those words released the tension I didn't realise was there. When I opened them I found we were now chest to chest. Our noses grazed upon each other in mutual comfort.

I placed my hand on his neck. "Promise?"

He gently moved his hand so it overlapped with mine. I let out a gentle sigh, the tips of his eyelashes fanned across my cheeks.

"I swear it."

"Brother."

Suddenly it was back, the feeling of unease, like icy drops of water trickling uncomfortably down my spine. There was also a burn in my stomach, reminding me of the turmoil he'd cause when everyone was unsuspecting, naive even. Even with my back turned I could see the flex of his temples and the straightness of his jaw. His tone told stories of the horrors he inflicted onto my mental and physical being.

I wasn't anchored to my own reality, instead I was drowning unpleasantly in his, my only escape was the dreamscape I'd groomed for years. It took the fibrosis of my being not to stay with my new comfort. Instead I turned and faced my related nightmare. No doubt I feared him, but this time was different from the others. His icy gaze still enclosed my heart with indispensable displeasure. The crook of his jaw still triggered sharp tingling in my skin. But none of those, not even the curl of his scarred lip overpowered the sparked defiance in my mind.

"Yes, brother."

I lowered my head, still keeping eye contact with him. To him this was a surprise. Usually my demeanour would falter and my eyes averted his. It was different now, somehow I borrowed my companion's confidence. It was radiating off of him, and I seemed to be basking in the toxins he emitted.

The slight agitated twitch of my brother's brow only fed my sensation.

"Are you going to to leave our guest here unoccupied?" He questioned. "Entertain them."

"I am already entertaining someone. You may ask the help to do it instead." I challenged, still keeping myself small and defensive.

"I'd rather you pertained to their needs," He probed while taking a step in my direction.

Everyone's eyes stapled themselves onto me again. I admired the audience. In a way I wanted everyone to see me be strong. I wanted them to see me the way I was meant to be seen.

I watched him take another step. This time it seemed the faint ruggedness of his breath was louder. The sound of his heels echoed in my ears, deafening any new thoughts. I closed my eyes and tried to recalculate what I was to do, only to open them and find him only a few feet away. My eyes glued themselves to the gape of his neck. I couldn't muster anymore courage. My breaths felt like sandpaper against my throat. No matter how deep I breathed my lungs begged for air. It was a mistake standing up to him. Even now he suffocated me. I could feel myself starting to unhinge myself and dissociate from my body.

"This fit is over."

That was it. It was concluded. I could still leave here without punishment. If I was to do what he said, there would be no more scars to tend to for the night. It was an easy decision.

"No." I choked out.

I watched his eyes go from ruthless to deadly. His hands clutched themselves into fist. His body shook with fury. The arch of his brows deepened into something foreign. Never have I outwardly defied him. He worked tediously to keep me in check. In his mind I was an object, a simple plaything. Still there are fragments of moments when I know I'm his favourite toy.

"I mustn't have heard you properly," he said before gripping my bicep, sending a sharp pain throughout my arm. "What did you say?"

I tsked in pain. I could already tell it would bruise. Without struggling I looked him in the eye and continued.

"I said, Screw off."

Pain whipped across my face, sending me flying to the tiled ground. I didn't have time to recover before a feeling similar to the pounding of a sledgehammer made itself known to my abdomen. Gasping I attempted to crawl away, only to be dragged back by my legs. My body shook in agony. Spit drooled down my chin as I felt the tumescent of my lip grow. The burning sensation in my arm was florescent to my mind, I could only focus on the memory of his hand armored tightly to me. His heavy footsteps rang in my ears as the heel of his carefully polished dress shoe wished passed the nook of my lobe. He knelt down and wrapped my hair securely in his palm, before pulling me up almost causing the dislocation of my neck. My throat burned from the sudden finite of air. I took shallow breaths to avoid passing out, even though black spots were already surpassing my vision.

The fire of his breath tickled my eardrum as he leaned down. "Did you really think that you could challenge me and go unpunished you incompetent slug? You are nothing. And you belong only, and solely to me. Do you understand?"

With difficulty I gulped and turned so we were eye to eye.

"Maybe to you. But right now, I'm strong and can take anything you give me, you psychotic motherless infant."

I wouldn't have thought it possible if I didn't witness his fury grow even wilder. It was only now that I realised the intensity of my mistake. Fear propelled me to slip out of his grip and onto my feet in an instant.

"Cas." called out a voice from the audience. I recognised it right away.

"Gabriel. You can't be here right now." I plead.

That only urged him to come closer to me causing her full figure to come to view. He was wearing his favourite leather jacket with fitted jeans. These were her date night clothes. Gabriel wasn't supposed to be here for another hour. He wasn't supposed to see me like this. I no longer feared for my own life, I just wanted histo be safe.

"Leave, now."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Brother pleas-" I begged.

The swiftness of my brother's fist forced me to clasp my hand to my mouth.

"You know," He commented. "I've had enough of you." He turned to me in vexation, his brown eyes fixed themselves on my neck. Before I could run, his hand clenched around my throat. "You didn't seem to take anything away from all these years."

"Lucifer, stop!" I heard my brother call out.

He ran to him and fought his grip in desperation. My eyes drifted to his in admiration. This was it, the moment my life ceased to exist. I gave him a small smile. He returned the gesture before focusing her efforts elsewhere. Without warning he kneed Lucifer in his bravado. Finally his hand loosened just long enough for him to knock my brother to the ground with great force. It all played out in slow motion. Even the sound of his skull shattering on the ground lasted millions of moments. All I could do was watch him panicked body rush towards the ground, his face plastered with fear.

I couldn't move, or breath. The ache of my heart was a kaleidoscope, an array of emotional turmoil. My world came to halt. I couldn't process what had happened. My eyes widened as I stood there motionless. The moment replayed in my mind as the event started to set in.

I closed my eyes in an effort to wish it all away, only to open them and feel the truth dig itself further inside of me. Hesitantly, I lowered myself toward his body. The faint whiff of fresh blood surged through my nostrils. My eyes were clouded with tears, yet the image of his lifeless anatomy was clear. I could feel every nerve of my being shake with agony. The taste of salty tears unified with the blood dripping from my mouth. Desolation couldn't even completely describe the sorrow I felt within my heart. I was broken, and my sense of identity was stripped from me the moment she walked into the ballroom.

I turned to Lucifer, my lips quivering in anguish.

"He's dead." I fused. "You took away the only thing that meant anything to me. And you.." My eyes traveled to my partner for the evening,"You watched. You did nothing."

Another tear fell from my eyelid as I lifted his corpse from the ground. My fingers stroked through his auburn tinted hair. I brushed his rough skin with the back of my hand.

"I'm so sorry Gabriel." I pulled his body in close. "I'm so, so sorry."

 

***


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel goes crazy

Lucifer's eyes watered, but he couldn't dare let a tear touch his cheek.

"Leave! Now!" I heard my brother vociferate.

I stood up, not cognisant of the blood that stained my silk suit and watched as people scurried out of the building, oblivious to the fact they just witnessed a murder and would probably pay with their lives for it.

I fidgeted with my fingers and licked my chapped lips. It was time to do something I should've done like my brother long ago. I took a deep ambivalent breath before looking up at my brother, disregarding the obvious ache he felt from what he had done. Usually in this situation I would comfort him, but all I wanted was to be away from him finally.

"Brother.." I spoke in a harsh tone.

His attention was now on me, not the defacing deed he had just committed. Lucifer was broken, he was fractured and I was to be the one to bring him back together again. It was always my job. I was supposed to flee with my brother today, I still had the opportunity even if she didn't.

However, it wasn't my time.

"Lucifer. It's alright."

I moved to comfort him. The base of my index finger caught a stray tear he finally freed from his stubborn eyelid. The orbs of his dismay caught mine and a fatal glimpse of who he truly was shook me through my core. He was powerless, and desperate to be loved. Without warning I felt him pull me in closer. The weight of him crushed my lungs. I didn't dare protest against his embrace. Instead I welcomed it in hopes he could fill the hole that was slowly digging itself into my heart. I held him in a desperate plea for pain to go away. He sobbed into my shoulder, gripping the sides of my stomach as his shoulders heaved up and down.

"Castiel, I'm sorry." He sniffed. He moved so we were face to face. It was now when I realised we were actually sitting in a pool of my brother's blood. The memory of his death flooded every crevice of my head. It overflowed and leaked through my eye as a single tear. When I looked into his eyes all I could do was grimace and look away.

"Your apology means nothing to me." I hissed. "It will never change the fact that he's dead and you're the one who killed him."

I flinched at the harshness of my words. They reminded me of my father's. I could tell they hurt him, because he looked away in shame, the same way he would if father had scolded him for doing something he shouldn't have. 

Immediately I regret what I said. Yet I didn't want to take it back. Even if it was a mistake to let the cruel remark slip from my mouth, it was honest.

"Please don't leave me." I heard him mumble. Shock overtook any other emotion I possessed. He had never said this out loud. Instead, he would do it through gestures of small courtships. Sometimes he'd go as far as to actually display his affection publicly.

In a haze of speculation I replied briefly. "I need you, just as much as you need me."

He sighed in relief.

I scowled. "Don't that as a compliment brother. You made me codependent the moment you banned me from taking a foot outside of this place. I blame you for that."

"Cas-" he started.

"It's Castiel," I snapped before taking a breath to regain my stature. "I'm going to my room."

I stood up and smoothed out the wrinkles of my pristine suit before lazily walking to a marbled stairway. When I got to the opening I turned to face Lucifer huddled on the ground.  
"Brother."

He looked up, his eyes pleaded for me to return to him.

"When your moment of weakness ends and you decide to lay your hands on me tonight in a drunken haze, I want you to remember how helpless you feel, and how I'm your only comfort."

He gawked in disbelief. The hurt in his eyes intensified into something soul shattering. If it wasn't for what he did I would be broken, dispensable.

But instead, Without an ounce of sympathy I left, leaving him in a puddle of his own desolation.

***

The wooden neck of my cello fit perfectly in my hand, as if it were specifically made for me. The iridescent strings glimmered as they took in the reflection of the moonlight. It was only me and my music. My arms flowed as the melody of Tartini exhilarated my fingers. The vibrato singed sweetly to my heart, and occupied every crevice of my mind. I felt the thin, refined processed pirastro vibrate as cries of agony rang from the body of my instrument. The hum of distant distress elicited a single tear to run down my cheek. These were the moments when I felt most alive.

"Castiel," I heard my brother call.

I smiled and opened one eye to see Gabriel sitting upright on my white comforter with his hands clutching his heart playfully. The the fabric of his hoodie scrunched tightly to his clutch. "Wow. That was amazing," he joked.

We both boomed with laughter. This was an ongoing joke we had, since our early years. I put a finger to my lips in a shushing motion. "Joseph mustn't know you're here."

"What's your deal with him?" he asked before remembering to lower and voice and whispering. "He always seems so possessive of you."

I gulped down my answer. The memories of my scars burned the back of my skull. I tugged on the collar of the turtle neck I was wearing. I wanted so badly to tell him everything, but somewhere deep down I also wanted to protect Lucifer.

"You're delusional," I joked. "I'm sure he's just trying to protect me from all of those street lurkers with weird serial killer fetishes."

He scrunched up his nose in disgust and threw a pillow at me with so much force I didn't have time to dodge. "Weirdo."

I laughed and hugged the pillow he gave me, while disguising my nose as I inhaled his slight scent on my pillow. He smelled of pine mixed with a whisper of lemongrass. I closed my eyes and indulged in it. He was my comfort.

"Cas.. I need to tell you something."

I looked up. The green in his eyes were filled with melancholy. He brought his finger tips to his temples and lowered them, revealing blood. I watched his eyes turn from a playful green to a haunting grey. The cheeks of his face started to decompose as his entire body canvassed itself in a dark red coat of despair. My face twisted as I took in his form.

"Gabriel, no!"

I ran to him in an attempt to help him stay alive, deep down I knew he was-but I couldn't bring myself to accept it.

I propped up his body and applied pressure to where she bled from. Tears streamed down my face as I gripped his cranium tighter, hoping doing this would insure his survival. This wasn't fair. He was supposed to be the one to live we were supposed to leave and-

"Castiel.." I heard a maid call. The sudden scape I was in dissipated. It was then I realised what I was doing. My hands were around their neck, digging into their carotids to the point where it drew blood. I welt her pulse slowly dissolve. I withdrew my grip, but it was too late.

My hands shook as I examined the blood imprinted under my nails. I placed a palm over my mouth, as to insure I wouldn't vomit. Breathing was difficult, and uneven. I sat back in shock of what I'd done. In a spur I laced my fingers over her chest and started compressions. I frantically used all my strength to push on her chest. Live.Live.Live. She didn't. Instead she lied there motionless. I took a deep breath before running a hand through my hair, and then down my face.

"Castiel." I heard a voice come from the door. My head snapped in their direction. Lucifer eyed the figure laying on my wooded floor. "Brother, what did you do?"


	3. Chapter 3

"Can you look into the camera and state your name?" An unenthusiastic voice asked. His tone was band and he seemed to be irritated with the situation. I've been silent since three nights ago when I was arrested for a double homicide. The officer, was also impatient and gestured towards his watch in a timely fashion.

I nodded and hesitantly spoke up, my voice raspy from little use. "Castiel."

"Castiel.." he waved his hand as to prompt me for a last name.

"Just Castiel," I was ashamed of my last name. It tied me to the monster that demolished the only person I could truly trust.

"Hmph. And you know why you have taken into police custody?" he asked, unfazed by the answer I previously endeavoured.

"I'm here for the murder of my Naomi." I answered into the lens.

"And." He pressed. I focused my attention on him in silence. The officer rolled his eyes when I didn't answer. I stared at him with tears in my eyes, pleading not to have to say his name. To him, I was guilty. It was apparent and hard to digest. Only I knew my true innocence, with the exceptence of my brother. I swallowed down the rage that surfaced when I thought of him. He lost any sense of loyalty we had the moment he picked up the phone, after I pleaded for him not to.

Three days ago

"Oh my god." he said. "You exasperated the maid."

"It was an accident."

"You don't strangle someone accidentally, Cas!"

"I did Lucifer. I swear it."

He stormed over to me and wrapped his hand around my neck. I didn't struggle, instead I stared him dead in the eye. He tightened his grip slowly as to torture me and watched as I finally struggled to get air. His lips straightened and his jaw flexed in vehemence thinking. He brought my chin up using his palm, bringing difficulty to the task of keeping eye contact. Now he was speaking, though it was muffled in my mind. All I configured as he spoke was the feeling of the spit of his breath hitting my skin as he emphasised his words.

"You lying mindless slug. Do you have any idea what I'll have to go through to make sure this doesn't get pinned on us."

I vexed at his vocables. "I'm the slug?" I retorted viciously at him. I leaned into his grip. "You killed your own brother."

"He was a traitor and nuisance." he uttered. "One I smited the moment it got out of hand!"

My eyes widened. He knew everything we were planning. I tried miserably to hide the shock ringing the hind of my head. I closed my eyes briefly before slowly opening them and gazing into his again.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I choked out defensively. "Your.. delusions are false."

He let my neck go, sending me gasping for air. "Don't take me for a fool Castiel, I knew about your charade the moment it began."

I looked down in shame, or more of discomfort from the thought that we never had a chance. He never had a chance.

"You sadistic asshole," I muttered.

"Hey I'm not saying it wasn't an accident. I'm just saying I'm pleased Gabriel entered when he did." Lucifer walked closer so that our breaths touched and fumed at one another. "It saved me the trouble of tearing him apart while you watched," he whispered while annunciating every grim detail.

I took in his scent, hating every aspect that I used to instinctively protect. "I despise you brother."

"In a week you'll love me again."

"No, you're wrong." I looked down in thought. It was time. "I'm leaving brother. In a week I won't be here to love you." I finished, looking up to view his reaction.

"You..would dare leave me. Over a small relation with someone who was barely even related to you."

"I could ask the same of you. You left father for me, only to turn your back the moment I traded your love for someone else's." I spat. "Lucifer I never loved you. I only felt protective of you and the shelter you provided."

It was as if I could hear his heart break. Though he didn't show it, I could tell he was hurt by my remark. His face hardened.

"You can never leave me."

With that he stomped on his way the door.

"Lucifer, what's that supposed to mean?" I chased after him only to be ignored. "Lucifer! What is that supposed to mean?!" I repeated getting antsy. When he was like this it meant a great deal of punishment was to come. "Answer me!"

He only increased his pace slamming the door in my face. I scoffed before trying to move the handle, only to find it locked. I played with the knob again to make sure I wasn't going crazy.

"Lucifer!" I banged at the door, panicked by his sudden silence. I jumped back when he hit the door in retorsion.

"I'm calling the cops. And I'm making sure they lock you up so I'll always know where you are and what you plan to do."

"Brother I beg you not to do this."

"Goodbye, Castiel."

"Lucifer please." There was no response. "please..."

 

~~~ Now ~~~

Sitting in this chair was suddenly a challenge. What I said came out in a husky whisper."I didn't kill Gabriel."

"Your DNA was practically beaming off of his body."

"I tried to help him. I tried to save him. What part of that do you not comprehend." I snapped, only to realise it made my situation worse. The officer smirked at my crude remark.

"That's the monster you truly are isn't it?" he whispered. His tone was suggesting and made me want to mutilate him. He continued ruthlessly. "The one that bashed in that poor man's skull!"

"Stop it." I covered my ears. "Stop."

The officer was relentless and persistent with my confession. "You enjoyed every second of it didn't you. You didn't just enjoy it, you relished it-"

"What do you want me to say?!" I begged. Though, I knew exactly what he wanted. He was after my soul. He ached for justice, and I was his sure way to get it. Slowly I looked up, tears hydrated my eyes as I silently supplicated for him to believe me. In this moment it was only thing that mattered. However so far Gabriel's justice constituted my demise.

"Concede!" he seethed.

I flinched at his words.

"That's enough." A deep habitual voice spoke from the doorway. I couldn't identify who it was until I saw their face. Even now he seemed parlous. The arch of his brow lifted in protective instinct. I could tell he was angry with the man previously scolding me against my innocence.

"And you are?"

"Dean Winchester," he turned to me. His green eyes pierced mine, and sent shock waves through my body. "I'm Castiel's lawyer."

"We were just in the middle of something." he scowled.

"Then let me join you, I'm sure I'll be thrilled to discover your tactics and report them to the D.A.."

His face turned bright red and his jaw flexed. The officer turned away, unsure of how to respond before stomping his way past Dean. Their shoulders impacted, but only the officer seemed to be affected by the rude gesture. Levi, the officer, scoffed dissatisfied that Dean didn't even flinch before continuing his path to the precinct.

I watched in awe as Dean casually mad his way to his seat. The click of his dress shoe echoed in my mind as every feature was recognised to my eye. I noticed his tainted lip turn down in a slight frown. It was something I otherwise wouldn't have noticed if I already didn't obsess over all of his facial idiosyncrasies. I wondered where the foreign mark had come from. But before I thought to much of it I turned my eye to his versatile olive toned ones, that always seemed to subdue me under the bewilderment of who he was. I was nothing short of buoyant to see him again.

"You're alive." I sighed into hands. I didn't realise they were covering my mouth until the warmth of my breath heated them. Quickly I dismissed them and placed the ligaments on the cool metal table, hoping he wouldn't notice, even when I knew he did.

"I expect to be. I just reached thirty five."

"I thought my brother would have gone after you. How are you here right now? You should be dead."

"Is that all you expect to come from relations to your family?"

"You didn't answer my question." I placed my right hand on his left. "You promised you would never lie to me Dean."

Hesitantly he overlapped my hand with his right one. Levi stared intently in my eyes. His eyes were strong and and looked as if they always proved to be honest. Even if he were to lie to me, I would believe him.

Hesitantly, but firmly he spoke. "I took care of the man your brother sent to get rid of me."

"I don't understand-"

"We'll take an insanity plea for your case." he interrupted. Normally I would briefly scold anyone who dared to disrespect me, but instead I nodded my head obediently in compliance. There was only one other person who held such a profound power over me, and this fathomed me to no end. He didn't lay a hand on me, yet every instinct told me to fear his capabilities and to treat him with the up most respect.

"We're making a plea?" I asked. Hoping it didn't mean what I knew it did.

"In your case, it's the only option."

I closed my eyes and let a lone tear escape from my eye, before looking up and offering feigned smile. He gave me an encouraging smile back. A small glint of sadness hid itself behind his iris, though to me it was fervent and stroke my heart with whips of sorrow. I wanted to comfort him the same way his immediate presence comforted me. Without thinking I moved swiftly to give him a tight hug, my chair falling immediately to the ground with force. The diminutive embrace caught him by surprise. Dean sat there motionless except for the shallowness of his breathing, before slowly bringing his hand up to the crown of my head. It was an odd gesture, but loving. I leaned into his touch. Pygmies of sweat seeped from his skin, another thing only I would care to notice and be mesmerised by the sight of. In a blind attempt to indulged myself more vehemently I sniffed at the spot the liquid covered pores occupied. The smallest waver of his scent crept into my nose, the rest masked by cologne. I clung to it desperately, I wouldn't dare let any of him slip through my grasp. He was all I could hang onto. He was dilute and gave me exactly what I needed. An Escape.

"I need your trust Castiel," he whispered.

"I trust you." I murmured.

He pulled away. The sudden coldness unsettled me. I tried to hide the hurt that dulled the throbbing of my heart.

"Then make the plea," He brought his hand up again to move a stray strand of hair. "I promise I'll take care of you."

He was sincere. His heavily diluted eyes earnestly focused solely on mine, the tension around us multiplied by the pressure he inherited to me passively. The corners of his mouth turned up in a hopeful attempt to probe the answer he wanted. Lucky for him I had already decided.

"I'll make the deal." I asserted.

Dean smiled fondly. "Have you taken your psyche exam?"

"No. As soon as I came here they questioned me." I uttered. Disappointment sat in my chest like a pile of ponderous stones. "I'm sure they've already labelled me."

He smirked phlegmatically. "Only the psychologist can do that. I'm ordering a psyche evaluation."

I nodded compliantly, though why he was doing this confused me. If I didn't say the correct thing, I could be convicted and given the death penalty.

"Now, as your lawyer. I'm going to tell you exactly what you shouldn't say. Are you ready?"

I gulped nervous about the new outcome I had to endure."Yes."

"Great," he took out some paper and a pen. "So now we can begin."


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel finds out Dean is a demon

 

Echoes of whines filled my ears. I watched as a poorly groomed man eyed me in lust, though something deadly lurked underneath his desire. I turned my attention to my nurse and took the cup hastefully.

"Slowly." I heard the nurse order. I rolled my eyes before picking up the medication in a leisured pace and plopping the large pill in my mouth. Taking the cup in my hand I did a "cheers" in a sarcastic motion, before swigging the minuscule cup. With little effort I gulped down the pharmaceutical and showed her my tongue. She sceptically took the cup and motioned for me to move along to my room. I obeyed unwillfully before accidentally bumping into the shoulder of a gentleman. He didn't react immediately except for a small grunt of dissatisfaction.

"Sorry." I whispered. He didn't respond. Instead all I could do was watch as his tall stature made his way to the library. Curiosity planted itself into my belly. I wanted so badly to follow him and ask why he was here. He was one of the more sane ones.

Instead I continued my path to my room and let out a sigh before plopping down onto my bed. The very ordinary ceiling welcomed my gaze as I stared up at it. Gradually I closed my eyes and smiled at the image that popped into my mind. Dean was there. I was also present, playing the cello with soul passion. He sat on the edge of my bed and listened intently to the notes as I gave my whole body to the motion of the music. My fingers cramped and ached from the prolonged positioning of a long note. I still played. I played with everything I had in me. I wanted him to hear me without words. I wanted Dean to see me without having to use his eyes. I wanted him to feel me without our bodies tracing every inch of each other. I wanted him to know me. My arms tired and screamed for me to stop, but I was desperate and needed to be freed from the constant agony of possession. I fed the pain that laced my fragile body and embraced the qualms that came and went was my favourite song rang from the fifths of my instrument. I only relaxed when my cry ended and the vibrations of my voice ceased to speak any further.

"Do you day dream often?" A voice called from outside my room.

I opened my eyes and gaped at the sight before me. For a moment I thought it was Dean, though large height differences told me otherwise. Regardless I clung to the thought that maybe he cared whether I was happy here or not. It was apparent he did not.

"It's the only thing I have." I replied, my eyes watered slightly. Memories flooded my brain featuring my brother Gabriel. I wanted badly to just let my emotions finally overwhelm me to the point where I couldn't stop crying. I wanted to feel a pain so profound I couldn't climb back to sanity. My eyes were wide and on the brink of letting do just that, they were ready to jump off of that cliff of sound thinking and land somewhere I never had to leave. The thought of surrounding myself with such empathy was now a comfort. My face heated with with hidden passion to just let myself go, to have so much emotion I would feel nothing. The danger of being on the brink of being in that state of transience lit a passion in me I didn't know existed. My mind knocked itself out of its dream state when the man before me grunted awkwardly. I swallowed with tremendous difficulty before turning my attention back to Dean Winchester's possible sibling.

"Do you realise when you space out? Or is it just this thing you do, because it's totally fine. I just want to know for future reference."

"Future reference?" My eyebrows burrowed into a confused expression.

"When we get out of here." He said playfully, though there was nothing playful about the look in his eyes.

"You want to leave.. With me? We just met." I countered. However, I wanted- needed to get out.

He swiftly moved so we were face to face. "Doesn't mean you don't already trust me." His breath fanned across my lips.

"Trust is relative." I whispered. My eyes darted to his lips. They were just like Dean's. To my surprise Dean stood before me. His sandy brown hair returned to memory. The soft freckles that dotted the crevices of his face blurred into a clear image of him. The previous imposter was no longer there. Only Dean. In lustful advocation I gulped to clear my thoughts momentarily.

In a spur I felt the warmth of his lips against mine. I received him eagerly. It was wrong, and it was fast. But it was also exhilarating and filled with anarchistic passion. Our tongues glided in synthesised rhythm. I felt his hands grip the back of my neck, keeping me with him and pulling me closer. The taste of him filled the crevices of my mind with impetuous feelings of elation. We were rabid and starving for the additioning of each others palate. We didn't need air, together we were better than oxygen. We gave off a friction that ignited a passion I've never experienced before. My hands traveled around the idiosyncrasies, of his physical form. When I started to feel lightheaded I pulled away, gasping for air. I still wanted him prodigiously.

"Dean." I whispered. The memory of him evacuated my mind, I felt as if I had betrayed him. I looked into the stranger's eyes.

It was as if a switch flipped. His eyes resembled something of indefatigable rage. Before I could run, his hand was around my throat slamming me onto my bed. I didn't struggle, but I was more conscious of what I did next. He was dangerously close, and somehow the threat he emitted exhilarated me.

"How do you know that name?" He growled. His spit landed in cold sprinkles across my face. I fought off the urge to lick the speck that landed on my lips.

"He was my lawyer," I answered calmly. "And my friend."

He let go and sat up. A light chuckle escaped his lips. I frowned.

"What?"

"The fact, that you think he cares. He's more sadistic than most of the other patients in here."

"He's a scant hostile, but that means nothing." I retorted. "He saved my life. If it wasn't for him I wouldn't be alive. I'd be strapped to metal chair, having my brain fried."

"You don't know him like I do," He warned. "To you he's a hero."

I gulped loudly. The sound of my oesophagus thundered through my eardrums, "If he's a hero to me. What is he to you."

"He's a nightmare."

"How do you know for sure?"

"I know because he's my brother."

***

I laughed at a joke Sam made, hugging my waste from delighted gaiety. My lungs seized as I retold the joke to myself, only to laugh even more all over again. He watched me in amiable fascination. Ever since our affectionate charade we've grown close. Though we still argue over our positions with Dean, the majority of our conversation is lighthearted and filled with new things we have in common.

"So er- you studied Enochian?" I asked. Intrigued by what wonders I still had yet to discover about him.

"Yeah," he scratched the back of his neck shyly before grunting. "Dean and I had this bunker, with this huge library. I could study for hours there."

"You and Dean must have been close." I said before realising my mistake. My shoulders tensed up at the unpleasantness the air around him started to give off.

Sam looked down at his hands, a sad smile prominent. Suddenly, the joke seem so funny anymore. "Yeah actually, we were." He looked up, his eyes apologetic. "Cas, he's the reason I'm in here."

"Sam, why didn't you tell me before?"

"There didn't seem to be a point. But now," He closed his eyes in intense focus. The corners of his jaw flexed as I watched him push away thoughts through pulses of frustration. When he opened them urgency riddled his bulky exterior. "Castiel I need to tell you what happened before we leave."

"Sam. Tell me." I divulged.

"Back at the bunker, we knew someone. Their name was Charlie. Her death hit him hard." Sam's eyes watered slightly. I could tell it hit him exerted tremendous anguish on him too. "He was obsessed with finding her killer. When he finally did he.. Did something that changed him. There was no turning back after that point."

"I don't understand. Sam, what did he do?" I asked. My heart raced in my chest, the sound of my heartbeat wavering in and out. Pulsations of fear increasing the anxiety that was already at its peak.

"He kil-"

"Bed time!" A nurse called. I jumped at the volume she emitted, the echo of her voice ricocheting between my eardrums. I closed my eyes momentarily to calm myself down. When I opened them Sam was gone. I sighed into my hands. His words clung to my memory like magnets to metal. The truth started to set in. I slumped down into my chair, ignore the complaints from my peers. I shivered in fatal realisation. If what I felt was true was veracious, we were most definitely, royally screwed.

***

The missed the wind. I missed looking into a clear night sky without the barrier of a window obstructing the view of the moon's waves. I missed how if it were silent, you didn't feel alone. You felt instead closer to the land around you. My lungs expanded with authentic gratitude. I breathed in the fresh air while clinging to Sam. He was the one who allowed me to see the world again. He made no effort to let go, instead he pulled me in deeper for a hug. The warmth of his tall eccentricity melted into my skin. We were free.

"You know Sammy," I heard a familiar voice shout. Suddenly the air wasn't cool in my lungs. It burned to breath. "I already told you what would happen if I ever saw you again."

Sam pushed me so I was behind him, protectively. I watched with trepidatious interest. I let out heavy breaths, as I eye Dean. He was different. The part of him I wanted to know was right here, burning my spirit and watching it suffer as it was swallowed by unmerciful flames.

"Dean, lets talk about this," Sam pleaded. His shoulders tensed up in preparation.

My eyes widened when I noticed Dean held a large misshapen knife in his hand. It appeared to be shaped similar to a jawbone, but from where I stood one could never be completely certain. His eyes turned a deep shade of black before switching back to their normal shade of green. My eyes widened at the sight before me. Dean bore a smirk so evil, it could bring out the darkness in anyone. He was a monster. I scrutinised Dean as he stomped his way over to us. I would have fled if I wasn't frozen from the horror coursing through my blood stream.

His footsteps approached in slow-motion. I gasped just in time to witness the unimaginable. In pitiful rage Dean gestured the knife so that it plunged into my comrade. It didn't betide the way he intended however. I felt the knife slide like butter through Sam and enter me. Pain, like a virus spread throughout my body. The introspection of how agonising it was to feel the blade recede, leaving me bent over suffocating in my own blood. Dark, hot liquid spurted up my throat, forcing me to gag repeatedly. It was an endless cycle of me choking on my own insides. I clawed at my throat, hoping the useless gesture would release me. I only wanted it to end. My lungs burned like hot coals, my muscles ached from oxygen deprivation. The asphyxiation put me in a pain so profound I wished I was dead. I fell to my knees, cursing when a hidden rock shattered one of my kneecaps. I wretched in pain,  the torment of my dismembered kneecap spreading throughout my leg, causing me to puke from the pain.  I let my body go limp and hit the ground with a loud  _thump_. My lids, heavy as bags of sand, looked up to view the owner of my demise. His considerably large figure loomed over me and Sam. It was now that I realised my partner was dead. I envied him. 

I looked up to meet Dean's green pools of fiendish reprobate. They still called out to me, and I called out to them. I wanted him to save me. Soon the feeling of my body being ripped apart started to fade, a bliss settled over me. I laid there on my side, blood pooled around my exterior. I licked at the droplets of fluid emanating from my mouth, before swallowing with immense effort. My breaths were shallow and slow. Still I remained grateful, my last day was spent free from the world. I smiled before turning over on my back and watching the sky. The moonlight welcomed me, the stars were just as accepting. I closed my eyes and kept them in this state. With one last breath, I fell into an eternal unimpeded sleep.

***

I woke up, my wrists burning. It was dark. The sound of dripping water tickled my ear drum. When I looked down, I saw why my wrists were sore. I was restrained with a think rope, my body paralysed by the braided straps. I noticed the place I had been stabbed didn't even scar.

The creak of a door caught my attention. My eyes widened when I caught sight of who was coming through.

"Dean?" I squinted to just to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. 

"You're awake, finally," He said. Ignoring my discretion. Dean, took slow steps towards me, making me panic and rock back in my chair. I would have fell, if he hadn't caught the back of my chair. He sniffed at my neck causing a shiver to run through my body.

"Wh-Where am I?" I stuttered. 

"You don't recognise it?" He answered. I shook my head steadily. He took out his knife, tracing the blade along my chest. "Castiel.. Welcome to hell."

 

 


End file.
